Scripted Film Reviews
This edition's Wankie Award^® Winners are....

• Best Film: That's Life 1 & 2 (OGV/Private)
  
• Best Actress/Hottest Chick: Tina Tyler in Desire (Legend)
• Best Threesome: Chloe, Serenity and Mickey G in The Other Side of Serenity (Wicked)

Click the title of the film to view the box cover, cast and for ordering info (it will pop up in a new window - just close that window to get back to the reviews!). All movies are rated on a scale of 1-5 stars; 1 being downright lame and 5 a nut-busting delight!

All right there boys and girls, porn fans of all ages. As most people know, my favorite style of porn is well written scripted porn. Porn with stories that turn the viewer on with the erotic content and fantasy situations. Basically, old school porn. Porn produced today usually doesn't capture the imagination of the old school classics, but every once in a while there are a few that come close, and a bunch that while not being classics, are still pretty damn good. Quality script, acting, and directing are all aspects that go into a great scripted porno, hopefully we can find some.

A scene from That's Life. (OGV/Private)

The best of the lot this month comes to us from our friends at OGV/Private. Once again the Europeans show us Americans what real porn art is. That's Life 1 and That's Life 2 (* * * *) are a true feast for any true porn fan. A quality, well thought out script follows Marcel Dupont (a Parisian mailman) who's bored with life. This is a little far fetched though, true he doesn't make a lot of money and his boss always chews him out, but he is married to a nymphomaniac (although she is the least attractive of the women in this movie), and every stop he makes seem to lead to him having sex with another beautiful woman. Oh well, he's bored. He then wins the lottery and his dream of moving to Bora-Bora comes true. In Bora-Bora he hooks up with an incredibly beautiful woman who winds up stealing all of his money. Oh well. Two great movies with a whole lot of amazingly beautiful woman and settings. The water in Bora-Bora is crystal clear.

A scene from Amanda's Diary 1 (OGV/Private).

OGV/Private also clock in with Amanda's Diary 1 (* * * *). Amanda is a very cute girl who just turned 18. In fact the first scene in this flick is her birthday party where she receives the gift of her first dong from one of her girlfriends. The story then takes us through her life as she uses her dong for the first time, has a fantasy of fucking a couple she sees in a cafe, and has lot's of sex. Not bad, but I would have liked the sex to have been a little hotter. Definitely a winner for anyone that likes young cute girls having their first sexual experiences.

A scene from Desire (Legend).

Legend has four scripted films for our enjoyment this month. The first, Desire (* * * * - not available for online ordering) is great! Right next to That's Life 1 & 2 for best of the month. Tina Tyler heads an all star cast in this sexual take-off of A Streetcar Named Desire. Tina is Blanche Dubois who comes to live with her sister Stella (played by the cute as a button, and one of my new favs, Shawna Edwards) and her new husband Stanley. This time around though Blanche starts off nuts and gets better as the movie goes on, the opposite of what happens in the real story. Great sexual scenes, great acting by Tina Tyler, and great sexual tensions as Stella starts to move in on her prey, Stanley, make this a keeper in my book. Great movie!

Next, Legend brings us Farmer's Daughters Do Hollywood(* * *) is a fun movie (pic of a scene at left). Not great, but a good time. The girls are super cute and that's what makes this movie work. There is also the whole "innocent girl in big city" fantasy that is played out. I liked it, but it's not a classic. I'd have to say skip Affair DuJour (* * * - not available for online ordering) and Love My Wife, Please (* *). Very little script worth mentioning, unenthusiastic sex, and an overall feeling that not much thought or care went into the each one makes them boring from conception to conclusion. Affair does have Gwen Summers and she is always cute to look at, but her scene isn't that great unfortunately. Love My Wife has Raylene, and she is always easy on the eyes, but even her presence couldn't stop me from wearing out the motor on my VCR as a fast-forwarded through almost the whole movie.

Now we go to OGV. Let me tell you, I love these guys. They usually have at least five videos a month that I fully enjoy. I'm always happy to get an OGV package. Let's start with the best of the lot, Back In The Saddle (* * * * - scene at right). Let me tell you how much I like this movie... I put it in again last night for about the sixth or seventh time and still had a great time. The story follows a divorced dad and his son. Since the mom died, they have been the closest of buddies. The son is boffing his girlfriend (Raquel DeVine) in the bedroom and the dad only knocks on the door to see if they want dinner. Well, they invite one of the girlfriend's friends (Shawna Edwards) over for dinner too, and she winds up in dad's bed for the night. Then her step-mom (played by Raylene) finds out and she boffs the dad too, let's just say, there is a lot of screwing going on, but there is also some fine acting and a good script. I'd say check this one out.

OK, if you are like me and LOVE Raylene, then I've got the tape for you. OGV's Torts And Tarts (* * *) is super Raylene-intensive. More Raylene then you can shake a stick at. Not much of a story here. Raylene is married to this guy who is studying to be a lawyer and not spending enough time satisfying Raylene in the bed. He then goes off to study with some lawyer buddies and they wind up getting into an orgy, and Raylene finds out. Listen, it really doesn't matter what the story is in this case. This is a movie with one purpose, to satisfy your need for Raylene. It works for about an hour and then you just want her again, but hey how can you blame me. Look at her! The lovely Randee Lee and Malitia are also here, so you know the cute factor is off the charts.

A scene from Torts and Tarts (OGV).

OGV's I Know Who You Did Last Summer (* *) was a big disappointment. Great packaging and a cute name I'm sure sold a lot of videos, but be wary. This really isn't a true scripted film. It should go under "Wall To Wall", because it's basically Ron Jeremy reading a story of different sexual situations that the girls act out. Ron is wonderful as always, and Temptress is also very cute, but they couldn't cure my anger at being duped. I wanted a cool script, oh well. They all can't be winners.

Also from OGV, Pussyman's Junior College Transfers (* * *1/2) delivers young-looking women involved in all forms of indecent behavior. Pman continues his struggle to overthrow the Dean's ban of his guest lectures at the college and there is enough of a thread running through the scenes to constitute an overall plot/script. Lensi Rae and Cheyenne Silver (seen at left) work one another in a great scene that turns out to be a little disappointing, but not by any fault of the performance. You REALLY want to see these two young, hot cuties get fucked by someone... ANYONE, but it doesn't happen. Someone give these girls a cock, willya? Alas, we are denied the porking of these two little vixens. Not to fret though, the rest of the film certainly gives you what you want in that area! Molina, Leanni Lea and Wynona Winter all burn up the screen with their youthful looks and hot bodies, fucking and sucking to the viewer's delight. This is one for those of us that like those young-looking, "Barely Legal" types!! If that is your bag, you CANNOT go wrong here!

From Wicked we get Last Day (* * *), another Raylene-fest. Raylene thinks the world is coming to an end at the end of the day and she talks all of her friends into living out their deepest desires. It's fun to watch all the dreams being lived out, but the story really isn't all that great. Chloe is in the movie and that is another reason alone to see it.

Raylene in Last Day (OGV).

Wicked also hits us with the new Missy flick, Desperate Measures (* * * 1/2 - not available for online ordering). This is my first encounter with the post-boob job Missy. Necessary? No, not at all. Missy looked just FINE the way she was, but... to her credit, she did get GREAT implants! The film starts off with two BJ scenes. In the first, Missy sucks off John Armstrong (ironically, playing a "John") in a 4X4. Yeah, you REALLY want to see her get fucked despite the fact that she is wearing a pretty bad wig, but she doesn't... points to Armstrong for keeping it real. Not many hookers will get horny and throw in a free fuck. The second BJ is decent... I have to beg your pardon for not knowing the actress' name. So, two BJ's is a bit of a slow start, but it rocks from there on in. Mr. Marcus bones an eager Phylisha Anne. Missy gets fucked by veteran Herschel Savage, ties it up with Stephanie Swift and Mickey G in a hot threesome, Randy Spears rails Jewel De Nyle and Maltia in a somewhat by-the-number plunker. There is a lot of fucking, and for the most part, it is quality fornication! The plot is actually bearable too! I am not the biggest fan of Brad Armstrong's epic films, but this one is actually pretty high on my list. A very strong showing from Wicked!

Chloe whips Serenity's ass in The Other Side of Serenity (OGV).

Up next, Wicked sweetheart Serenity shows her nastier tendencies in The Other Side of Serenity (* * * *) and damn, are they good to see!! Serenity usually plays role similar to the neglected wife in Crazed or the clueless bimbo she portrays in Date From Hell. Both her lesbian lickoff with the gorgeous Charlie and hump with Brad Armstrong, although strong performances, aren't a stretch for our Heroine. It is a threesome with the ever-amazing Chloe and Mickey G that really shows Serenity on fire! We are talking NAAASTY, sweaty fucking here, ladies and perverts! Chloe, ever the mashochist, gets whipped and smacked, which doesn't come as much of a surprise... but, when the punishment is turned on Serenity, my jaw was dropping to the floor! Fucking, whipping and sucking are abound in what is perhaps the best scene I have ever seen Wicked produce. This alone is worth the price of admission! As if that wasn't enough, we are also treated to a magnificent performance by Miss Stephanie Swift in a scene where she takes on two guys, one immediately after the other, hungrily fucking and sucking both to completion in a hot tub. It doesn't get much better than this...

Last but not least we hit Sin City. My major complaint with this company is their tendency to make "pretty" porn, without much sexual fire. Neither of these falls into that category. In fact, I was very excited about both of these movies right off the bat. I first got excited with Ladies Night (* * * *) when I saw that one of my all time favs was in it, Asia Carrera (seen at right). God she is cute as a button! Well we follow her through this story, starting off in her bed with her brand new husband. They fuck through the opening credits which I did NOT like, but that's OK the rest of the movie makes up for it. Asia we find out is a nympho that needs sex all the time. That's good for us, and that's all we really need to know. Get this movie.

Sin City's Shooting Sex (* * *) is the newest pic from directorJames DiGiorgio (scene at left). This movie is an opus to him. It's a behind the scenes look at the porn industry and how movies are made from the point of view of James. A little too intensive in the "Kissing James' Ass" department, but still a very enjoyable watch. Not a masterpiece, but good for someone that is interested in a closer look at the porn industry as a business... and the sex is good too!

Overall, not a bad lot this month. I really thought that good scripted porn had gone the way of the dinosaur, but we have quite a few here that I'd match up against an average Skinamax movie any day. Ladies Night, Back In The Saddle, The Other Side of Serenity, Desire, and That's Life 1 & 2 are films all worthy of praise and repeat viewing. They are the best of the lot this month, and a nice lot they are. 'Till next time, good jerkin', and always remember turn the volume down when the kids are home. - Piston Rod and Al Kikuras