MZTV Gyrations (Zane, 98)
Starring:BROOKE ASHLEY, DAVE HARDMAN, RICK MASTERS, KIKI MORGAN, KYLE STONE, ALEX DANE, LEXI ERICSON, HOLLI WOODS.
Directed By: Matt Zane
Rating is on a scale of 1-5. 1 being poor, 3 being average, and 5 being exceptional. For an explanation of the review criteria, click here
- OVERALL: * * *
- SEX: * * 1/2
- ACTING: n/a
- SCRIPT: n/a
- J.O.P.: * * *
- FAST-FORWARDING: * * *
- EDITING: * 1/2
- CONDOMS: SOME
Matt and Mandy host the first ever X-Rated dance show! This is shot like your typical dance show like Electric Circus (Canadian dance show on Much Music). This vid features the music of Dr. Neptune but his mixes are no Chris Sheppard. (Canadian dance megastar d.j.) Matt seems a little uptight for some reason and Mandy is terrible but not hard to look at. The video quality and cheesy graphics make this movie look like a bad 80's porn flick. This movie is obviously the beginning of what is to become a series of dance shows hosted by and directed by Matt Zane. If this was a TV show I would dig it but I wouldn't spend $6.00 to rent it.
Now on to the sex:
The first scene is a 2 way that becomes a 3 way with the very lovely Lexi Ericson and Rick Masters. This is a very hot scene that is very well done. Lots of oral action in this one with few position changes. This makes the sex very easy to get into. After the cumshot they are joined by the equally hot Alex Dane. Despite the fact that he just came Rick is already all over Alex with Lexi giving her some hot oral in turn. This is as hot as the first half of the scene with a second cumshot. You rarely see male multiple orgasms on film in the same scene anymore so this was fun to watch and a great way to start the movie!
Back to the show where we see a little dancing from some of Matt's party guests who aren't featured in any of the scenes but are having a good time with the ladies anyway. Also it is noteworthy to watch the pool because even though it isn't meant to be an official scene we see Brooke Ashley and Alex Dane naked and dancing and doing it periodically in the shallow end. Then we see Matt and Mandy interview the girl in the next scene! (Kiki Morgan)
In the next scene we see Kiki Morgan and Kyle Stone go at it in a good scene but not as good as the 3 way earlier. The heat was there but the positions and the shoddy editing hurt the flow of an otherwise good scene. I feel it's time to bring back real-time sex with less direction and more cameras.
Back to the show where we see more of the Brooke Ashley and Alex Dane pool adventure. I like these ladies but they don't seem to work well together. Matt is able to pull Brooke away from what she was doing to talk about her upcoming scene which she happily states is anal.
Possibly Brooke Ashley's last ever sex scene was an anal with some guy. Brooke was relentless in her dirty talk and this ruined it for me. I like her and I like a little dirty talk from my women but she went overboard and it left me cold. This wasn't the only thing that ruined this scene for me. There was a part where the scene was sped up so I didn't have to fast forward it. This ruined the flow of the scene and it made it suck. After the cumshot the guy asks Brooke what she wants to be when she grows up and she answers, "an anal queen!" Be careful what you wish for folks.
Our final scene looks like a reject from Easy Rider videos. It features Dave Hardman and Holli Woods. Holli looks like one of the 7 Beckys on Roseanne but is covered with tattoos. Dave has loads of them too and this was a total turn off. There was little heat in this scene and this was the epitome of how far the quality of women in the industry has gotten. By far the worst scene in the movie.
BOTTOM LINE: I can appreciate what Matt Zane is trying to do with this movie and the inevitable sequels that should follow but he has to learn to save his best scenes for the last ones because every scene you put in your movie is a build up to the next one. If one scene is great we expect the next one to be just as good. This didn't happen and the fast forwarding button was pressed many times the second time I saw this one. Also Matt really needs to loosen up in front of that camera and get a more competent sidekick. He looked nervous and avoided speaking a lot. Mandy was just plain lost without a map. I really believe Matt should get a cable show on Exxxtasy or Playboy where he can get a better grade of camera and be able to have a good dance show with sex in it. That would be cool. On a video it misses the mark. Cool idea, mediocre results because of the medium he chose.- Johnny D
Review Key:Reviewed on a scale of 1-5 stars. OVERALL, SCRIPT, EDITING - self explanatory. SEX - the amount and quality of. ACTING - can be actually good, or good in a bad way, in the sense that it is so bad it is entertaining. J.O.P. - Jerk-Off Potential. FAST-FORWARDING - the urge to hit that FF button, be it during dialog, rehashed sex-scenes, whatever. The more stars, the less fast-forwarding. EDITING - somewhat related to fast forwarding. Do they show a ball shot for too long? The same angle for an eternity?
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