Music Reviews

Engorged - Where Monsters Dwell (Razorback, 2004)

Rating: 9.5/10

Kicking off with a sample from Inhumanoids, and the first song revolving around the cult cartoon, you know that you're in for a fun-filled feast of diabolical death metal with ENGORGED's masterful Where Monsters Dwell. As the album title would indicate, the songs all revolve around monsters, from the mighty Transformer ABOMINUS (the resulting Voltron-ish giant that is the result of the Terrorcons joining together), to the gigantic squid, Architeuthis, each song is a foray into the oft-cheesy world of monstrous villains. Musically, this is the stuff metallic dreams are made of. ENGORGED thrash, blast and smash their way through 42 minutes of absolute mayhem on Where Monsters Dwell, standing heads above the metal masses through superior songwriting, an ear for great fucking parts, and their ability to cohesively combine the greatest elements of death metal, grindcore and thrash. ENGORGED never sound like they are genre-jumping. Rather, the music flows. ENGORGED manage to make every song catchy, every part has purpose. Like a real good hot dog, there is absolutely zero filler on Where Monsters Dwell. Vocalist Dave turns in an exemplary performance, with a tremendous range from deep growls to high-pitched screams, thrash ranting, yelling... everything but an operatic soprano. The guitar work is excellent. Riffs are thick and sticky. The solos are purposeful, the bass is nice and crunchy, the drum performance is stupendous. Where Monsters Dwell is one of Razorback's finest releases, and beyond the shadow of a doubt, one of the best albums of 2004. If you don't like this one, punch yourself in the crotch to make sure you're still alive. - Al Kikuras

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Mithras - Forever Advancing... Legions (Candlelight Records, 2004)

Rating:  8/10

MITHRAS from the UK are a band that really shocked me. Looking at the lyrics, and cover I was expecting some type of black metal, but much to my surprise they have more in common with say MORBID ANGEL than DARKTHRONE as I was expecting.  Thats not to say MITHRAS are simply a band taking the overdone and now bland Florida death metal style and copying it to a T, they do enough stuff here to really make them stand out as their own band who just happens to have been influenced by some of the earlier bands who came of Florida.

The best way I can describe this musically is a combination of MORBID ANGEL from the Formulas Fatal to the Flesh era, and a touch of PESTILENCE added in.  MITHRAS have found a unique blend and really made this style all their own, do it with some class and show that brutality doesn't always mean blood and guts album covers, and basically playing a bastardized style of goregrind. Hating God can be just as brutal as talking about fondling a dead body.

The production here is very unusual with its balance, everything just sounds terrific.  Their guitar tone lends itself very well to recordings, the drumming isn't too loud, the guitar has some crunchiness to it, and the vocals are exactly as loud as they should be in the mix.  What I really like about this album though is how they can write rather catchy and brutal rhythms as well as leads that really feel like they belong in the particular songs.  It doesn't feel like guitar wanking just for the sake of it, I actually hear some emotion in the music. Great album, and I'd definitely love to check out more from them. But one minor complaint before I wrap this up, a 4 minute intro? Come on, keep it at 30 seconds or so. - Rick

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Necro - The Pre-fix for Death (Psychological Records, 2004)
 
Rating: 8.5/10
 
Ah, NECRO. A white rapper who, if pushed under the mainstream spotlight, would make EMINEM seem about as threatening as the Care Bears. NECRO has become somewhat of an anomaly in the underground hip hop scene. He may also be the first rapper to successfully combine hip hop, hardcore and metal since ANTHRAX re-did "Bring the Noise" with PUBLIC ENEMY. It's pretty unusual to pick up a hip hop CD and see guest appearances from members of BRUTAL TRUTH, HATEBREED, OBITUARY, SLIPKNOT and VOIVOD, but NECRO certainly brings in the reinforcements here.

The most interesting aspect of NECRO is the broad range of his appeal. His lyrics are certainly out there and will have many pissing their pants in hysterics. He proves a vast knowledge of the occult and a love for metal. But the biggest surprise for me is his genuine musical talent. NECRO handles guitar and bass on all songs, and he's no novice. Few can jam with Away (VOIVOD) on a hip hop song and pull it off. This one is definitely a keeper on so many levels. I should also mention the excellent layout that pays tribute to porn, Charlie Manson and The Church of Satan. - Big Juan

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Olympos Mons - Conquistador (Limb Music, 2004)

Rating: 8/10

Just when I write a scathing review of how bad Limb Music is, I break out this record and I knew right from the getgo that it would be awesome? How? Well, I'll be honest with you, I knew it because of the large breasted woman at swordpoint on the cover. Only a truely metal and masculine band could get away with such obvious penis imagery.

OLYMPOS MONS has that elusive "it."  "It," in this case, is excellent heavy metal with great melody, a good vocalist, heavy drumming, interesting and melodic guitar work and a tight sound.  These guys are obviously Finnish in style.  So I did a bit of further research (produced by guitarist Jari Sundström) and found that I was right!  They are Finnish! More proof that Finland is the place to be when it comes to symphonic power metal.

What I like about this band, though, is really the in your face heaviness. It's not "death metal" in your face, obviously, but as far as power metal goes, they have a chunkier sound than a lot of the Finnish scene (maybe not the new NIGHTWISH, but certainly than their older stuff, and thicker than SONATA ARCTICA and THUNDERSTONE). There are definitely old school undertones, and the entire record isn't made up of the "power metal drum beat."

The only complaint I do have, however, is the vocalist.  While he's good, and there are good melodies, sometimes it sounds like he's going a little flat when he's heading towards the upper range. That really killed the song Black Desiree for me, and there were other notable moments.  But these are few and far between, and frankly this made up for by his lower range and the solid musical composition.

I guess I'm just a sucker for this Eurometal sound (SONATA ARCTICA, NIGHTWISH, THUNDERSTONE, NOCTURNAL RITES, RHAPSODY, BLIND GUARDIAN). This stuff really does it for me, when done correctly. Part of it is the thrashy roots, and part of it is the technicality, but I think what's great about bands like this, OLYMPOS MONS being no exception, is great melody!  I've mentioned it twice and I need to mention it in the closing paragraph, what makes this record fantastic is the melodic content. Every melody on here is catchy and while the vocalist isn't as good as others, he's got a good voice and a good grasp on the feel of the songs. - Jim Bob The Enforcer

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Pagan's Mind - Infinity Divine (Limb Music, 2004)

Rating: 3/10

For every one great band, there's 25 shitty ones.  Unfortunately for Limb Music, they've signed some of the terrible ones.  While I know that I've been very hard on them in the past and I'm sure that I'm going to get myself lynched by these guys someday, I'm going to  continue to tell it like it is.

PAGAN'S MIND has the makings of what could be a great band.  But, again (how many fucking times am I going to have to use these criticisms), a bad vocalist, a complete lack of interesting melody, and poor songwriting forces me to discard all talent and judge soley on how bored this record made me.

I'm not kidding. The boredom rating on this record is 10/10.  While it started out strong, I immediately grew to dislike the vocalist (who really does sound like every vocalist SPV has ever signed... that Swedish guy, anyone?) nearly immediately. With a progressive NOCTURNAL RITES kind of sound, I also grew to dislike the band pretty quickly. After about 5 songs I kept glancing at the clock to see when this album was going to be over.

So let's talk about all my complaints, here. Firstly, the vocalist. Like so many power metal vocalists that I hear today, this guy sounds like he's trying his hardest to imitate Kai Hansen and Bruce Dickinson. Again, like so many guys I hear today, he fails miserably at it. He has so much vibrato in his voice that at times he goes flat because of it.  He sings entirely through his nose and has poor tonal quality. While his lyrics were not as some others that I could note (MAGIC KINGDOM), they're nothing special (and I would like to accuse Steve Harris of starting the worst lyrical trend of all time, the "Tell it like it is, in no poetic structure whatsoever," trend).

The music is bland and missing it's edge completely. While there may be some thrash metal influence (like all modern power metal), any of the edge that is usually retained in good power metal bands is completely missing here.  This is like the muzak of power metal. It's like a canned orchestra version of Run to the Hills that's being piped over the loud speakers between shitty renditions of Christmas Carols at the mall.  While these guys can play, they sure can't write. Far too much of this album is spent extrapolating on a contrived melody and a single chord, while the rest of it is spent doing musical masturbation.  While I must admit that occasionally there was a groove that I dug, it never lasted and if it could have, the vocals killed it in an instant.

I'm becoming very frustrated with this.  I used to call myself a power metal guy, but I'm beginning to find that power/progressive metal as we used to know it is beginning to melt away into this post-DREAM THEATRE boredom.  Someone needs to get a little bit of balls and make a power metal record that doesn't suck. And SPV needs to get a hearing aid and sign a power metal band that doesn't suck! - Jim Bob The Enforcer

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Red Harvest - Internal Punishment Programs (Nocturnal Art Productions, 2004)
 Rating: 8/10

Imagine if NINE INCH NAILS and EMPEROR (RIP) decided to pool their hostilities into a collaborative effort. A record that married the majestic synth work of Emperor to the intense industrial programming Trent Reznor has become famous for.  If you can put these pieces together you'll have a very good idea of what you're going to be getting with Red Harvest. I've heard one of their previous records, and I can definitely say this one is much better.  RED HARVEST have a way of coming off as catchy and aggressive at the same time, which is uncommon in metal. If you're interested in hearing a record that successfully combines black metal with industrial sounds then this is for you. But if you don't like NINE INCH NAILS you probably stopped reading this review after the first five words. - Big Juan

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The Doctor - The Doctor Is In (self-released, 2004)

Rating: 9/10

This is an extreme mindfuck of a release. The Doctor is twisted in all realms... vocally, lyrically, and musically. While I suppose the black metal tag would be appropriate, to label this as just black metal would be to do it an injustice. For starters, I have never heard vocals quite like this on a black metal release, or any release for that matter. They sound like Vincent Price gone sub-sonic gurgle. A drum machine is used effectively, giving the music a fitting inhuman feel. The guitar work is impressive, with a lot of depth, layers, melody, and a generous sprinkling of pinch harmonics. The predominant feeling of The Doctor Is In is one of unease. Imagine meeting someone and being able to tell, from the first moment, that he or she is just... off. "Not quite right," as the saying goes, yet you have to spend the next 32 minutes in that person's company, knowing that at any second he or she might snap. That tension and anxiety is what I feel while listening to The Doctor, so much that it approaches dread. But, like a good, creepy horror movie, that dread is just what I want from The Doctor, and like your tongue constantly returning to probe a painful sore in your mouth, the dread just has to be explored.

The Doctor Is In not only sounds deranged, but sounds as if it came from someone with a deranged mind. The release apparently tells a very twisted story, with song titles like, "The Doctor Will See You Now," "The Operation Didn't Go As Expected," "Nurse, Would You Please Hand Me The Chainsaw," and "I Hope Your Insurance Will Pay For This." I hope this gets a proper label release (thus far it has only been self-released in 50 copies) as I sorely want a full package with lyrics, and a label would show a lot of sand releasing this disc.

The Doctor takes an entirely unique approach to black metal, bringing his own sounds and ideas to the table without abandoning the basic characteristics of the genre and that is the main strength of The Doctor Is In. I think a large faction of black metal fans will grasp and appreciate what The Doctor is doing, while others will simply not get it. In either case, like all great albums, The Doctor Is In will be sure to have people thinking and talking. - Al Kikuras

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UDO - Thunderball (AFM Records, 2004)

Rating: 5/10

UDO is classic heavy metal, with its roots in the German power/trad metal scene from the late 80s.  You may remember that UDO had roots in ACCEPT, I unfortunately remember these things all too well, and I'll be up front. This is not a style that I'm particularly fond of.  While I consider myself a metal historian, at least in the fact that I appreciate the roots of things, this is not a style that I was ever fond of.

I was never a big fan of AC/DC, which of course, is the most obvious influence of UDO.  These guys have been overtly rippin' their sound off since 1987, and really Thunderball is no removal from this classic sound. In fact, aside from sounding more tired, this sounds like it could have come out in 1987. The drums are still the static, classic rock drums and the guitar tone has hardly changed. UDOs vocals are still Bon Scott, he just looks older than he did then.

As far as aging rockers go, this album is the most consistant and least cheesy that I've heard in a long time. It is to their credit that they've stuck with the original format instead of trying to update it and sing about "cyber space" or something cheesy like that. This album is almost a time capsule in its methodology and consistency. The solos, the drums, the bass (or basic lack thereof) and the screechy vocals all sound like they could've been released during the late 80s/early 90s.

The best part of this record is the song Trainride in Russia, which deserves a special mention for its polka feel and the accordian! It has a very FINNTROLL or folk metal feel and UDOs Bon Scott impression actually takes a bit of a break.  The song is great, and definitely deserved a short paragraph. I think that UDO as a band has found a new calling. Make metal Russian polka.

For old school fans of heavy metal like Al Kikuras, I'm sure this record will shake them up and excite them. For me, its just a reminder of how much cooler metal has gotten over the years. How much vocal styles have improved, and how much more interesting the musicianship has become. This album is good for what it is.  There are songs that I enjoy, but most I don't. There are guitar solos and melodic parts that I love, and some I don't. There are times when I was rocking out, and times when I was rolling my eyes. - Jim Bob The Enforcer

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Usurper - Cryptobeast (Earache, 2004)

Rating: 9/10

Awesome. Just awesome. USURPER have returned with a new vocalist and a new lease on metal. Cryptobeast is, by far, their best effort to date. This is a glorious collection of raging metal tunes that has all of the appeal and attitude of classic metal, but does not sound remotely dated. What USURPER does that many "retro" bands fail to is they write GREAT songs. Songs that rattle around in your brain for days after hearing them just once. USURPER play with all the chops that metal musicians had yet to develop when CELTIC FROST and KREATOR were in their prime. Listen to "Supernatural Killing Spree," with its ultra-fast double bass and riffing, and what I am calling the "new millenium thrash beat," which sounds like the Kill For Pleasure-era Ventor (KREATOR) drum assault on a gallon of speed. "Kill For Metal" gets my vote for metal anthem of the year. Relentlessly heavy, with a great chorus, it sounds like MANOWAR gone death metal. USURPER are the perfect example of a bunch of metalheads who live and breathe the stuff, and damn it all, they managed to make just about the perfect album. Get these guys a few kegs, they have earned it!

By the way, making the CD look like vinyl, complete with grooves in the face?? Give whoever came up with that one a raise! - Al Kikuras

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Whorid - Death of Beauty (Rusty Axe, 2004)

Rating: ?/10

Well, this one certainly brings me back. When I was in high school, there was a band called SECTORION that released one demo, Tears No More. It was putrid. But, like many a Troma film, it was so bad, it was good. WHORID's Death of Beauty reminds me very much of Tears No More, from the terrible production, to the primitive, hand-drawn photocopied cover, to the underdeveloped and sloppy music. But, the DIY-nature of it all, and that it reminds me of so many crappy demos I received when I was running the print version of Unchain back in the late 80s/early 90s (when it was a crappy, photocopied paper zine as opposed to the crappy web site it is now) makes me feel an affinity for what WHORID is doing. And what exactly is it they are doing? Mostly noise, at times sounding a bit like goremetal, a bit like death metal, a bit like black metal, but on the whole it is just a big wall of sound. I think this may be the absolute worst drum machine I have ever heard in my life. It sounds more like a bad recording of tribal percussion coming through an old, crappy, 6" black and white TV. I can't really endorse this. If you miss the old demo days, you may appreciate it, and for $3 it's worth it for the nostalgia, but if you're looking for coherent and good music, look elsewhere. Got to give them credit, though. It takes sack to put out a release like this. Thanks for the trip down memory lane! - Al Kikuras

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Zombie Ritual - Night of the Zombie Party (Razorback, 2004)

Rating: 8/10

Razorback does it again... another gore-filled, non-stop thrash fest of epic proportions! Japan's ZOMBIE RITUAL have the clever gimmick of using the word "zombie" in every song title. "Zombie Party," "Zombie Drive," "Zombies Devour You Alive," "Zom-beer," and so forth.

There was a guy named Wesley Willis. He was a schizophrenic, huge, bulking fella that played keyboard and sang songs. Check him out if you haven't already, and may he rest in peace. Wesley wasn't much of a vocalist, or a keyboard player, or a songwriter, but he ended every song with the phrase, "Rock over London. Rock on Chicago..." and then a product slogan, like "Arby's! Different is good," or, "Wheaties... breakfast of champions." What got me in to Wesley was I wanted to hear what slogan he'd say next. His actual songs were pretty annoying at first, but after hearing them enough times to get to the slogan at the end, they started to make sense to me, and I came to love his style.

What's my point? Repetition works. Just like Wesley pulled me in by using "Rock over London," ZOMBIE RITUAL have done likewise with "zombie," though the major difference is that, from the get-go, ZOMBIE RITUAL's music appeals to me. Bass-heavy, nasty, thrash-laden death metal with catchy choruses, ultra-deep gargled vocals peppered with grating screams, great riffs of varying tempos, and tongue-in-rotten cheek lyrics. This is FUN, people. Like label mates LORD GORE, GHOUL and ENGORGED, ZOMBIE RITUAL take the music seriously, but aren't above having a few laughs. From the gloriously repugnant cover art, to the band photos with the members decked out in (what else?), zombie make up, Night of the Zombie Party is a satisfying slab of gore metal. If you are familiar with Razorback's modus operandi and "get it," then you will find Night of the Zombie Party to be as much of a blast as I do. Buy the CD, along with the rest of Razorback's catalog, so they have the dough to put together a huge fest where their whole fucking roster plays. I'd travel to the bowels of the planet to see that. - Al Kikuras

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